Your silence, your lack of contact is the way to win over the narcissist. Through your silence and blocking the narcissist, you will win one day. It doesn't matter if you left the narcissist or he left you, it doesn't matter how dramatic the breakup was. The most important thing is that you already know who you're dealing with and that no one will ever win anything with such a person.
You can only lose with a narcissist because the narcissist always wins. Your biggest win after breaking up with a narcissist is this simple thing like silence. To the narcissist, you were just a source of resources. You thought you were in a normal relationship, that's why you gave the best of yourself, you tried your best and the narcissist took advantage of it.
The purpose of life for a narcissist is to elicit a response from you, and it doesn't matter if it's positive or negative, every response you make matters. With each of your responses, he feels powerful, alive, in control of you, and that control over you is what he wants. Total power and control is the way to victory because of them, the narcissist always wins.
Your reactions feed the narcissist, they are the air he needs to survive. When you deprive him of your reactions, he will no longer be so powerful. The narcissist has an advantage over you until you know what you're dealing with. Once you know who you're dealing with then you can apply the right rules to his sick game. With these simple rules, you are the one who can win. Silence is the golden rule when it comes to any interaction with a narcissist. The golden rule is no reaction.
The narcissist wants to provoke you to a certain reaction and if you do not react, you do not let him provoke you to react, you win. Even if you are forced to interact with the narcissist, you keep that contact to an absolute minimum. You no longer share your secrets, worries, plans, thoughts with him, you start to keep it to yourself and you give him evasive, short answers. A narcissist doesn't want what's best for you, never has. he wants the best for himself. You are the means to his end, the means to correcting his low self-esteem. So far you have invested all your energy in the narcissist, now it is time for you to start regaining this energy and investing in yourself.
Any relationship with a narcissist is bound to fail sooner or later. Through silence, you take away your energy and significantly limit the narcissist's control over you. The energy vampire immediately senses this change and is not happy about it and will try to provoke your reaction even more. By not reacting, you set boundaries, your message makes it clear that you are fed up with this treatment and you no longer agree to it.
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